Day 1.

So the first classes is in about 6 hours which means it's about 1am right now.. All I can think about is getting this thing done already...The steps to get here was humbling, but I been ready this whole time..I got ha books ready, reviewed in the prior weeks and prepped up for this. The only thing to do now is shine...I been really thinking about how far I would like to get into this program and I was entertaining the idea of really going all tha way...We'll see how it goes...maybe I can cut corners to get tha same pay... I got some great advice on how to go about my journey in this, so I'll make it worthwhile...Let's see how it goes...

Updated: So class was ok...Being tha first day, parking was a bytch, though I'm there at 6:30am...Campus seems more crowded this semester except this time around I have a direction of for my new career...Today we basically went over stuff for clinicals which happens pretty soon and I'm still up! hahaha it's all good...I found out that the photoshoot we did during tha summer. Tha pictures were used for tha school's banners...crazyness...I'll post those when I go back to campus on Weds....We did get acquainted with the 2nd year students...So that was cool to see their progression...we'll see how it goes...

Adventure Through Ceders....

So today a classmate and I had a run at Ceder's to see time the drive and scope out tha parking...I t wasn't to bad at all. It's about a 20 minute trip...We ended up introducing ourselves and making friends with either receptionists or security guards...Pretty funny stuff...And we ended tha field trip scoping out tha cafeteria, which I might add is very nice. A lot of selection and humangus!

Here we go again...

School starting next week and I got all my books...I'm pretty stoked to get dirty now...I'm not worried about school, I can't wait to see how I turn out after this. With all these bumps in the road, heartache, sacrifice it is well worth it...I'll be half way to my goals as far as being able to provide..The second part is the other half that is deserving of it all...I pay attention and we'll see how it goes...I was asked again, "Any regrets?" and no regrets because I seen the life I wanted...It's going to happen and it's just the "time" factor of when things fall into place...I can be patient and I continue to practice that.

I was caught in a situation where I'm so aware of. Of course I'm understanding, but there's a thin line between that understanding and loyalty...And to satisfy someone else and not watch yourself is a suckah move...

Lately, I been physically and emotionally drained...The gym is getting me back where I need to be, but my brain has been hurting over stupidity and non-sense...I need to shy away from that and back off...I really don't want to get back into old habits, cause boy you know I can be the Dream and I can be tha Nightmare....They say pick and choose your battles, tha thing with me I can take on anything and I will win, but if there's a time I do falter, believe I'll get right the second time around.

Updates Yo!

Well school had finished and this semester was not too bad..I got A's for both classes and my clinial site is Ceder's Sinai...Pretty awesome so far...With my new found Potential and Drive I think I may want to take this career to another level..Doctor perhaps? That's getting ahead of myself and of course "Sky'z tha limit all we got to do is keep pressing on" that by Biggie, he was wise...

Anyways, I get my moments again for self doubt about school and relationships...Why this?, What could of been done different? Am I better off? Did I Try my best to make it right?. I dunno, but it also takes two to make things happen. ..I use those doubts as my fuel to get this done and while I'm doing it, being the best at it...You come across the "Nay sayers" or guys putting you down, saying "you not good enough", But seriously, There telling yours truly that?, There out of their mind messing with me...I can kick their ass, Yes...But I'll kick their ass in the work that needs to be done..Actions are louder than words...And I'll walk my talk...

It's hard finding someone to confide in and let your heart loose...I do have my my best friends and especially tha time difference and crazy schedules it's bad timing to make a phone call. I recently been in touch with someone who can I can definitely say, had impact of the way I act now...It did break my introversion as kid to tha crazy guy you hold before you...I appreciate how this person can build me up again and remind me, when I have those doubt moments...Hanging out to get me back into tha groove of things and it's been really nice...much mahalos...

I got a break going on, and it's good. Resting my brain till school starts and doing stuff that's really out of my comfort zone..I'm learning more about myself and learning more of how to approach things in better manner....I got a lot of plans for upcoming concerts as well...It's been awhile since I enjoyed listening to good music that gets you that "chicken skin" feeling...and I'm looking foward to it...

My feeling on Hawaii right now for me is iffy...Of course I miss it, friends and all but I know when I step off that plane, the air isn't going to be right...I had some great memories there, and it's just, I feel the need to move on with it and make even better memories to come....Things always change, we'll see....

Gettin back into my Comfort Zone......

Last week is a great week... I been focused at the gym and I been able to hang in there rep wise, I can run a little longer and I do feel stronger..I have a lot more to do, till I get my mojo back.. As far as school, I still have my eye on the prize and I'm into right now... I bust my ass in everything I do and that's the way I been brought up. Work Hard and you'll get where you want to be..

I'm grateful to have someone to talk to and and living with some normalcy again. Though busy schedules, I'm glad we make it to hang out..so thank you..you know who you are...and yea, i think jennifer love hewitt would of said hi! to me...hahah

Onto to other things, I mentioned to a very good friend that "I'm Happy".. It's been awhile, just cause I used to frown on a lot of things about relationships lately and doubting myself of what I can offer for someone. Right now it's more about how I would do things differently and to make sure, what I do have, I take care of it...A work in progress and constant learning..I'll never figure it out, but I got a some ideas...

Hawaii, Hawaii...well, like i said before, " It sucks, that cost of living and tha Pay" is not going to change for awhile. So it's either you better have a good paying job, or work 2-3 jobs to make ends meet. I'm trying to avoid that, so one day if I do decide to come back, it'll be because I'm comfortable..

One thing I really notice about people when I come across, whether at school or work is the lack of CONFIDENCE.....Some people really need to be "baby-sitted" or have their "hands held" to get through things.."Just cause you have a degree in something, your dumb as shit when it comes to common sense". ...I used to get annoyed at this at work or with the kids at school....But this is how I handle it now and what I tell them, " I won't do it for you, but if your willing to learn, I'll be happy to teach you." I used to push those type of people away, cause I didn't want to deal with that, but I learned some people need a little guidance and encouragement..It's that Guidance and Encouragement that they are probably are not used to and that's what they need to get them going...Hold yourself up high and hold yourself up well...Don't live with regrets use those experiences to prepare for the future situations...Don't be scared..You just got to go for it...You don't now unless you TRY or ASK...There are people out there that are willing to work it out and make things right...Just be Confident Yo! Whether you know it or not..hahah

Sorry for the rambling. Just all these thoughts and really my entires have no structure to them..who cares..hahah...Have a good week..!

Summer School winding down...

Summer classes is coming to an end with next Tuesday being the last day. It really wasn't so bad. It was a solid foundation to what we are getting ourselves into for this Fall. Pretty much prepping up the students. If some of the guys were having a hard time now, they not gonna last in the Fall or even the other semesters....

The past few weeks were pretty much going over Safety in the hospital for the patient and yourself. Accreditation and the other organizations that we need to be aware about in the x-ray field. The Wednesday class was role playing and preparing the students for the clinicals. Today was the last of the checkoffs. We had to show we were capable of administering contrast and assisting a patient onto a wheel chair just in case you need to take him/her down to the lab. From what I got in the whole summer was that Communication is key. Explaining yourself to the patient, on whats going on and making sure you do things properly.

I notice some guys just there for the money, which is fine but I'm on a different plain where I do care for a person's well being. We'll see how it goes..All the jobs I ever had, I feel help prepare me for this. Talking to a person, no problem for me now..It was a big thing when I was a kid where I was shame and shy. But now, it's cool. The person that you could be talking to could be just as nervous.

Until school starts I'll be preparing for the Fall. Like I said before. No Vacay, but I do have a big break in December...I'm gonna try take advantage of that.

Side note..I been practicing guitar a lot lately atleast an hour a day, or whenever I'm not studying..I can't shred or pick, but I could hold down some rhythm..hahah...Maybe one day, I can show it off...And I keep thinking about a big trip to Paris and Tha United Kingdom...I dunno, I'm gonna make that happen though...

Be well and be grateful....there's no need to worry about anything...we get there somehow....

Friends are Good...

Ever since my move back here, I got to hang out with some of my childhood friends and Dude! it just trips me out seeing how they have turned out. It's a good turn out though...We were kids running tha playground with no worries. We would have had no clue where we turned out or if even were going to keep in touch with one another in tha future.. We were all still figuring stuff out and just growing up. Well I'm grateful for tha few I have kept in touch with and I hold them dear to me beacuse they seen me from back then till now. I have friends that taught me some things that have has helped me conquer some of my fears from back then.

Hanging with them still kills me inside. I laugh and I start thinking bout tha good times back then. We didn't all hang out in tha same groups, but we had a common bond becuase we went to tha same elementary school or we were just in tha beginning of our teenage years experiencing those teen wonderment. Those were tha days, just because we didn't have bills and all we wanted to do was galavant and explore the world.

I finally got hang out and have a gym sesh with a friend that plays a great deal in what I am today. And we were like "dude, we old". "I remember this" and all those other good memories. She said she came across pictures of us from way back then, and honestly I'm scared to see it, just keep it in that box. hahaha =) We got to catch up on what was going on and it hit me that I was grateful for each and every person that I'm in touch with here in L.A from back in the day. Whether they know it or not, they are important to me because they seen me progress from yay young to yay old...and it still continues now because we in tha "high school" of our adult years figuring things out. It's fun to see what our next moves are.

One of the reasons I went back to L.A not only to continue my schooling, but was because when I went back on a vacation back then, one of our friends was having a baby shower. It was awesome to see everyone I knew from growing up. After catching up and seeing all the great things going on with them. Something snapped inside of me where I thought, " I want a piece of how they living". It's a sense where, I envied what I saw in each and everyone of them. Regrets came across in my mind where I wish I continued high school and grew up with them, but I couldn't think like that cause Hawaii also contributed in my well being. I wanted more and I had to do, what I had to do. This reason helped in my decision to be where I'm at..

Of course I miss my Hawaii friends, they helped "tweak", tha already awesome guy you all know..haha that's right!...just playin...I learned a lot and took a lesson from each person to help define what I'm about.. They instilled a lot of great values about dealing with people, making things right, no worry beef curry and helped me find my love of music again. I'm grateful for that.

Those who hung out with me and know what I'm about. Thank you so much and I never forget what each person has done for me, whether small or big. It's because of your friendship I strive to do what I do and You know I take care of tha homies...